Due to a potential lawsuit by the government of Denmark over portrayal of the Danish as berserkers, the Minnesota professional football team has decided to change its nickname to the Gentle Explorers.
Flash mobs of excited Danes filled the streets of the tiny Scandinavian country after the news was announced.
"We are happy now that Americans see us as the quiet, peaceful people," said Bjørn Bjørk Børsen, owner of Thor's Hammer Emporium, a battleax and horned helmet costume import/export business. "We are no longer like the violent, bloody ancestors associated with the era of the Vikings."
The Minnesota team owner and head coach were unavailable for comment. Sources close to the team stated anonymously that the two men had last been seen sleeping off a bender after an allnight argument over why they gave up a third-round draft pick for a publicity stunt.
In related news, sales of Copenhagen snuff containers have skyrocketed, prompting one ad agency to suggest the Minnesota team's nickname should be the Cøpenhageners. The team's behavioural law specialist rejected the recommendation, saying it sounded too much like "cope and hate 'em or else," a veiled drunken threat.
Speaking of not being able to cope, a talent agent not officially representing Randy Moss says that Mr. Moss is on a homecooked meal boycott until further notice. Memphis BBQ joint owners are heading to Nashville to change Randy's mind. Country music star Taylor Swift might consider filming a music video with the "I'm too rich for that s%#t" bad boy of pro football and fine dining.
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