A Connection Between Adversity, Diversity and University - Versatility!

The other day, while Conan was letting a bunch of neighbours take his Veyron for a spin around the playground, I stopped snapping photos to consider what it's like to be a frugal millionaire.

Then, after watching Leno crash his electric Sparrow at the sight of his protege having more fun fans than he, I knew what it was that perplexed my complexion.

There are only two people on this planet who know what's really going on and I can't tell you their names.

Sitting on a secret is liking sitting on a flight from Yemen to the UK or the US - the seat cushion's hot for no apparent reason, except for that teeny-tiny lipo battery installed in your posteriour that keeps your pacemaker and you alive.

What if they accuse you of being a living version of a box of toner?

Even worse, what if you have no effect on the economic recovery of your favourite country?

For me, it's a dream come true.  I always wanted to be an unknown nobody and if I don't spend my uncounted millions, nobody'll know who I am 'cause I won't change the engine of growth we call the bartering society.

I leave it up to my colleagues and associates to decide how to conduct business like a symphony, causing mass movements for both fun and profit.  Seven billion people to have fun with, joke with and siphon off legal gains in public and other laundromat material out of the public eye.

I got an invitation to a museum opening.  The director wanted me to see the new works of art.  When I look in them galleries, all I can see are those transactions of my friends that have to be covered by purchasing overhyped splotches of paint on canvas or wire and sticks stuck together in so-called sculptures.  But, hey, if it keeps the creative types occupied, you know how I am - don't let the idle curiosity seekers poke into my business and I'll pay to have them dedicated to esoterica.

Besides, I've got friends with billions to spend on founding colonies off of this world.  It ain't art but it should make us a pretty penny, what with the adverts we'll sell along the way.  That, and the film tie-ins promoting trinkets all the kids'll want.  We'll make the Star Wars franchise look like a rank-and-file amateur production.