Wheat Brew

"Me brain is full t'day, I say."

"'Tis?"

"Yah. 'Tis."

"Full o'...?"

"Ain't sure, I reckon."

"Ain't sure yuh ain't sure or ain't sure wut yuh brain is full o'?"

"Yah."

"Uh-huh."

"Yep."

The two of them sat on the porch looking out over the ridge. A bunch of buzzards floated on a ridge riser.

"Any rain in the prospect?"

"My joints ain't achin' none. You?"

"Nope. Hungry?"

"Nah."

They both took a couple of gulps of homemade hooch stored in a 3-liter soda bottle.

"Gonna make any deer jerky this year?"

"Nah. You?"

"Nah. Got enough guv'mint cheese to last me through the winter. You?"

"Yep. And food stamps, too. You?"

"Yah. Gotta cut som firewood, tho'."

"Yep. Got your whetstone handy?"

"Here."

"T'anks. Whittlin' blade's a bit dull."

A jet airplane left a contrail in the sky above them.

"Yuh ever know'd anyone t'uv ever flown on one of them?"

"Nah. You?"

"A cousin down south said he did."

"Anything come of it?"

"Reckon not. He got hisself a dee-vorce later on."

"Figures him right. Them newfangled contraptions ain't good fer nothin', nohow."

"Reckon you's right."

"I finished eighth grade, din't I?"

"You're the smartest one on this here mountain, is what you is."

"Reckon so."

"Think them bulldozers'll be up here by the end o' the month?"

They took another swig of the hooch.

"Could be. Could be."

"Reckon we otter buy up some mo' land?"

"Ain' got the dough."

"Maybe we otter go back on the road?"

"I sho hate givin' up this peace and quiet."

"But thuh crowd sho love them Siamese Twins o' thuh South."

"We IS famous."

"Ay'uh. That we are. What are we carvin'?"

"Since they say we hexed, how 'bout a little mountain witch?"

"With a switch?"

"And a big ol' itch..."

"...For a sandwich or sich!"

The conjoined pair looked down at the piece of tree branch they were whittling. They knew their manager would use the finished creation to cast a line of trinkets to sell. They heard the trinkets brought in big money overseas where things were sold through telephone wires and floating spaceships.

"Reckon we otter get sump'n t'eat?"

"Reckon so. It's gettin' dark. 'Sides, I'm hongry."

"Me, too."

"Let's go inside, then."

"Reckon we will."